The Opponaut's Creed

"Haimatox" (haimatox) 10/29/2014 at 18:30 • Filed to: None

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This is my car. There are many like it, but this one is mine. My car is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life.

My car, without me, is useless. Without my car, I am useless. I must drive my car true. I must drive faster than the enemy who is trying to overtake me. I must pass him before he passes me. I will.

My car and I know that what counts on this track is not the laps we complete, the noise of our exhaust, or the smoke we make. We know that it is the times that count. We will win.

My car is human, even as I, because it is my life. Thus, I will learn it as a brother. I will learn its weaknesses, its strengths, its parts, its modifications, its steering and its engine. I will ever guard it against the ravages of weather and damage as I will ever guard my legs, my arms, my eyes and my heart against damage. I will keep my car clean and ready. We will become part of each other. We will.

Before the Track I swear this creed. My car and I are the defenders of my race. We are the masters of our enemy. We are the saviors of my lap.

So be it, until the checkered flag is ours and there is no enemy, but peace!

Blue 300 > Haimatox 10/29/2014 at 13:33

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I will keep my car clean...

Welp, I guess I won't even make it past basic.

R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet > Haimatox 10/29/2014 at 13:49

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Literally had to say the source material of this every night before Taps.

Haimatox > R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet 10/29/2014 at 13:52

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What? Where/when?

R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet > Haimatox 10/29/2014 at 13:52

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Rifeman's Creed

MCRD San Diego, Charlie Company Platoon 1019 Sept.-Dec 2004

SmoresTM Has No Chill (O==[][]==O) > Haimatox 10/29/2014 at 13:57

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Tonight... you pukes will sleep with your car. You will give your car a girl's name. Because this is the only pussy you people are going to get! Your days of finger-shifting old Mary Jane Flappypaddle through her pretty pink panties are over! You're married to this car, this machine of steel and leather! And you will be faithful!

Crest > Haimatox 10/29/2014 at 14:42

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Why the hell is this not on the front page? Every man needs to recite this first thing in the morning when they get out of bed

 > Haimatox 10/29/2014 at 14:45

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Not bad.

http://oppositelock.jalopnik.com/racers-creed-1…

Haimatox >  10/29/2014 at 14:57

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I wasn't trying to copy you, just to clear this up.

Haimatox > Crest 10/29/2014 at 14:58

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Haha that would be nice if it were.

 > Haimatox 10/29/2014 at 15:14

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Wasn't insinuating that you were. Just posting since it's relevant.

Blondude > Haimatox 10/29/2014 at 18:36

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I must drive faster than the enemy who is trying to overtake me. I must lap him before he laps me. I will.

Unless he's clearly a superior driver. Then you're just an asshole who won't let anyone pass.

Haimatox > Blondude 10/29/2014 at 18:45

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We're assuming he is not.